I was thinking about this post in the midst of a foul mood.
Over time as a relationship evolves how does the division of labour also change sometimes without us even noticing- when I first moved in with my husband he was horrified when I offered to put some of his t-shirts in with my wash, he firmly told me he was a grown man who'd been doing his own washing for the last ten years and my help was not required.
Now I've been doing the washing for so long that I don't think he can even use the new washing machine.
He also used to cook for me, my colleagues used to laugh at how useless I was in the kitchen and how lucky I was to come home to a cooked meal each night.
Now I've been off with the baby for the past year and I've taken over all of the responsibility of meals for the family.
Cleaning, well to be fair he lived in a shared house and none of them did that much cleaning.
Now, he says I choose to be so picky over the tidiness/cleanliness of the house and not to worry about it so much but I do all of that to.
Being at home with the baby does mean I do have some flexibility to my day, it makes sense to do the hovering seeing as he loves to watch the hover and it keeps him occupied for an hour. But it's not always easy to predict a baby so sometimes things are started and not finished or just plain not even attempted.
At what point did all the household chores become my responsibility? He might (it's not guaranteed) do something if I ask/nag but it's unlikely he'd look at the over flowing washing basket he's about to stuff his dirty clothes into and think oh I'll go and put a wash on that looks full.
I feel annoyed when I think about the things which are just dumped onto me but then when I'm calmer and think carefully about things I also know I can't really complain, over time I've absolved myself of responsibility to things like car insurance, bills, car repairs, anything which belongs in the shed, taking the rubbish out.
